On the Subject of Hair

I don't write about my hair very often, because I would only sound like a complainer. I'm pretty much never happy with my mop. It's always too wavy and frizzy, in spite of the embarrassing amount of time I spend on it every day. I've tried countless combinations of products and numerous brushes and flat irons. All to no avail.

I've come to terms with the fact that I am not gifted in hair styling. And good styling does indeed require a gift from God. Those of you who can whip up a mean hairstyle...I covet you. I know the Bible tells me to not envy, but I just can't help myself.

I usually enjoy getting a fresh haircut, even if it's simply a trim. I like someone else being responsible for my hair for one day. I typically walk out of the salon with a bounce in my step, feeling so pretty.

But not today. I went in for a trim. A trim. (Do you see where this is going?)

I explained that I wanted one-half inch off my long layers and the framing around my face. I also explained that I wanted my bangs to sit right at mid-eyebrow, and I even pointed to the exact spot. I also explained that my bangs curl quite a bit.

Jo, a new hair stylist that will never again touch my hair for as long as I breathe, apparently understood the whole 1/2" off the layers bit. She even understood the framing around the face business. But she did NOT understand the bangs at mid-eyebrow level. Because this is what I was left with:
Does that look like mid-eyebrow to you?

I didn't think so. And how do you like that blank stare in my eyes? That blank stare means, "What. did. she. do. to. me?!"

And let me clarify that photo was taken after I flat-ironed my bangs TWICE! And I have not stepped foot outside, where it's 96% humidity in this lovely climate where I live. So, let's all pause for a moment to breathe deeply while thinking about the fact that I have to leave the house tomorrow and face the world with those bangs.

Lord, help me!

And this is me trying to fake a smile:
(Hate that lazy eye, by the way.)

Did you buy that smile? No? I'm gonna have to work on that before leaving the house tomorrow.

Please say a prayer for me at 8am CST on Wednesday, as I face the world with the shortest bangs I've ever had in all of my life. I will be saying that prayer every day for the next three months.

Also note that these photos were taken after Rick came home and said, "Well, maybe you can pull some of your longer hair over to cover the bangs." That would be a comb-over, and no thank you. And then he said, "It will grow."

Wrong answer, dear. That did not make me stop thinking about the fact that I feel like an 8 year-old girl with these bangs.

Anyway, enough about me. What do you think about this beauty?
That's my niece, Edie, born this morning to my brother and sister-in-law. She's gorgeous!

Thank goodness she hasn't faced a hair crisis yet. Your time will come, baby girl, but I will be here to help you breathe through it.


starbucksgirl said...

There's always hats! I still think you look beautiful. And, I LOVE the lazy eye.

common mom said...

That is sooooo NOT mid-eyebrow!!! So sorry man - my hair stylist can screw up pretty much any part of a cut she wants to EXCEPT my bangs - you've seen my freakishly huge forehead ;-)

I must say, though - they don't look awful - I was expecting worse from your intro . . . all bangs are in right now - short and long. You can always part 'em and make 'em part of your longer hair and comb 'em to the side, too.

You're still beautiful :-)